TO FORGIVE AND NOT FORGET ...

To forgive or not forgive … that is the question!

Which do you think holds true from among these statements? “To forgive and NOT forget” or “To forgive and forget.” Between these two statements, I think the first one holds true. Why is that? Well, sacred scripture has the answer. Do you remember an account after the resurrection when Jesus first appeared to His disciples? What was the first thing that Jesus showed to them? It was His wounds. The simple gesture of showing them His wounds implies that He was truly hurt. The cross was a painful experience and yet, he endured all of it just so in order that He could fulfill the plan of salvation. That He may truly become a worthy instrument of forgiveness to man and that we too may have the capacity to forgive. Let me explain further:

1. First, WE HAVE TO FORGIVE AND BE RECONCILED. Considering the shortness of our lives, clinging on to grudges is simply pointless. The forgiveness that we offer to others is the indispensable condition, which makes it possible for us to receive God’s forgiveness and to pray with peace as we say in the Our Father, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Jesus illustrates in the Gospel that there must be no limit when it comes to forgiving our brothers and sisters. To forgive seventy-times seven times means to forgive endlessly.

Three months after the terrible attack of Sept. 11, 2001 (ten years now), the then Pope John Paul II, in his message for the annual World Day of Peace, taught clearly that “there can be no peace without justice, and there can be no justice without forgiveness.” That’s a message that has gone largely unheard and unheeded on all sides of today’s conflicts. If we want justice, we can fully achieve it through forgiveness.

2. Second, WE MAY NOT BE ABLE TO FORGET THE HURT WE HAVE EXPERIENCED, BUT WE CAN CHOOSE TO FORGIVE. As life goes on and we remember an incident that was truly hurtful and have caused us great anger, we need to remind ourselves that, with God’s grace, we are capable of forgiving the one that hurt us. Time indeed heals. Forgiveness finally changes us from being prisoners of our past to being at peace with our memories. Forgiveness allows us to move beyond the pain and the anger. When we forgive we make a healing choice. We can forgive the offender by wishing him/her God’s blessings and by simply offering him/her to God that both of you may arrive at true peace. When we withhold forgiveness, we remain the victim. When we offer forgiveness, we are doing it also for our own well-being and not just that of the offender.

On the same note from the late John Paul II, three decades ago (1981) there was an attempt on his very life. Fortunately, he lived. After he recovered, he shocked the world when he made a visit to Rome’s Rabbibia prison on Christmas day to see the man who attempted to assassinate him. After 20 minutes of visitation, as he emerged from the cell he explained, “I spoke to a brother whom I have pardoned.” A week after, the headline in Time Magazine said, “Why forgive?” Well, today’s readings give us the answers.

3. Finally, ON THE STEWARDSHIP OF FORGIVENESS. In Ellen White’s book, “Thoughts from the Mount of Blessing” she said, “He who is unforgiving cuts off the very channel through which alone he can receive mercy from God.” When we cut off such channel, we also, in a way, cut off our worthiness to be a steward of God. Last week, I pointed out that our everyday work should be treated as a sign of stewardship. But such work could be best carried out when we are freed from the burden of an unforgiving heart. As stewards of God’s creation sharing God’s gifts, we too, must be stewards of God’s forgiveness.

This Sunday, we are given a great task of forgiveness. To many of us, who are holding grudges because of a hurtful experience, Jesus assures us of His healing forgiveness ONLY if we ask for it. Moreover, he gives us channels of graces through the sacraments especially the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Such channels give us the supernatural power that we may be able to forgive others no matter how grave their offenses are against us. Like what Jesus said in the Gospel, we must forgive our brothers and sisters not only seven times, but seventy-times seven times.

Together with our plea for forgiveness and the grace to forgive, let us include in our prayers the victims of september 11 for their eternal repose and also for peace of those who are affected and are left behind.